.:Greetings:.

Hi so how was your day today? It was alright day, thank you. I think I had a productive day. I woke up at 0530 to get ready for work, worked my ass off to earn some bread for myself and somehow get what I want right? Busy day at work today, I was actually doing MY JOB! I had English class today, talked about Not Wanted on a Voyage and I was very keen on the participation and took notes to help me out for my final exam. Then I took the sky train to New West got me some MAD ILL sashimi, pink roll and all that good stuff..Work my ass off in the gym and for your information made me FEEL SO GOOD! then to treat myself I had my Japanese dinner! YUM! Oh and I have a Job interview at the head office at my work as a receptionist. I'll give the interview a shot but if I get the position I might not be going to school =(. Decisions Decisions Decisions..but then again that's what's really good..Goodnight.

.:Blind:.

Help me...I can't see through you...

maybe I'm just permanently blinded by the surroundings and unable to see what is around me anymore.

I cannot see through this spectrum...

.:Failure:.

That is all what has come after the equation it equals to failure..

I wonder when success will be added to it...

.:Love letters:.

I was watching the movie Sex and the City I earlier today...I realized that I would like to receive loves letters once in a while..I would make sure to keep it in a safe place and keep reading it over and over again until I'm not able to read anymore...

.:The nerve:.

i'm loosing my patience on you!

.:Super Moon:.

Ok it has been quite a while since my last entry. It has been all songs lately so, I think its about time to just think out loud and speak my mind.

I have been feeling stressed and down lately. Doing a lot of self seeking, soul searching and trying to figure out MYself. I had to start thinking of my own personal goals and what I really want in the next 3-5 years of my life to be accomplished or somewhat to have accomplished.

I know for a fact that I have so much in my plate and its literally overflowing because it doesn't fit anymore. I am still indecisive of what would be my next step if I don't get a seat for April. I'm still not sure if nursing is still a way to go. On the other hand, I can't even see myself do other things but care for people. Maybe something related to health care but not nursing? what do you think? I have not accomplished anything since you passed away. I just become aware of that recently. Honestly, I do miss you very much. Because I have no dad to ask for advice if I have boy problems. I know I have not opened up to you before, but my reasons were because you were struggling with your illness already. I didn't want to add anymore stress on you. I can only talk to the air around me and pray really hard to get a sign or an answer. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy when I do get to see you in my dreams once in a while. I just want to hear you once again and just hear your dad advice. aahhh why am I teary eyed again. I just miss you so much that I wish that you can witness all of us mature and one day to walk me down the isle. Unfortunately, that is not possible. It will not be the same feeling when MY OWN DAD will pass me to my future husband, whom I will love unconditionally, submit myself with all my heart, support, and understanding no matter what may have come between us.

I wish for you to talk to me in my dreams and have a really long conversation and word of your advice on what you think I should do, and I will just decide later on, on how I will lead my life and make the choice for myself, for my future and my future family...

I miss you! >.< =*(

Murs-The Break Up

Aaliyah- Come Over

.:A Street Car Named Desire:.

I'm in this empty classroom stuck with my paper (20%) of my final mark. So far I'm on my 3rd paragraph out of the 5 I have to write. Why can't I just say my paper out loud. I don't do well with this writing and analyzing. Can I just talk about the play itself and tell you how I understood it? I mean the moral of the story would be just fine to explain and participation marks I hope count more. I'm keen like that. This paper doesn't end here, I have another presentation I have to do for feminism and apply and present how it correlates with Jersey Shore (females) which is a 10% mark.

I've been so confused lately, I feel like I'm not going any further with this career thing. My life is put on a stop and don't know where to put myself in. I've been on this long escalator ride and suddenly it just stopped somewhere in the middle. Do I need a change of careers for me to be happy with my life and be passionate with what I do? But the thing is I can only see myself to be a nurse or someone that works and take care of people. I don't want to be stuck with this care aid job. I feel that I can offer more and I want to learn more. With this English crap is making give up, but it's the last course I need to take to get in the BSN program. What am I thinking? I'm just so overwhelmed with this paper and I'm trying my very best to get at least a C+ or higher because that's all I need to move forward for my Nursing. I don't think I have any problems with Nursing courses once I get there. I mean I've done it before and why can't I do it again?

My time is ticking. I have so much goals I want to accomplish before I'm 30. Right now is just becoming to slow and I feel like I'm running out of time like a ticking time bomb. If this doesn't pull through where do I go? what do I do? start again? aiya...life can be very hard..but here you are with my arms wide open not knowing how to deal with it. As much as I want to embrace it, it's still hard...

God help me...

Runaway - Bruno Mars lyrics